Long Live Scoldings!

      

By- Pamarty Venkataramana

 

Scoldings – the perennial tool.

Of dominance?

 
Of rectification?

 
Is it being harsh to chide one’s children?

Or is it even brutal to admonish one’s spouse or siblings?

What if a teacher seeks to imbibe sense of discipline into disciples?

Can a well-wisher be accused of indulging in wanton act of scolding if plain-speaking appears impolite to an uncaring recepient of any such sermon or a lecture for course-rectification?

Well,this seemingly ‘undesirable act’ actually posesses a most therapeutic effect.

How?

For one,it helps bare out one’s soul snd mind.

Two,this helps exhibit the divergent state of mindsets.

Three,it reflects the positive intent of the one scolding as also of those being scolded.

What is pertinent in today’s world scenario that while resolutions passed by world bodies such as the United Nations Organisation condemning war between member-nations is overlooked in the gamut of things, any act of scolding by a parent or spouse is blown up to gigantic proportions and treated as battle of egoes or stretched up to join the genre of hatred and even scrutinised and classified as being an ‘enemical disposition’,forever.

Scolding has been noticed to be a major cause for unjustifiable trend of very young children moving out of parental-homes to far-off places for studies or youths flocking to alien shores in search of livelihood.

Even more distressing is that an inherent lack of understanding of actions prompted by care,love and concern being underlying factors of any such ‘scolding’ among equals or those feeling an affinity towards one another has been the monster stalking minds of persons leading to higher rates of attrition at work-places and even divorce rates,among married couples.

 

On a more informal and casual level,the supposedly fashionable act of a ‘break-up’ among youths is mainly prompted by the non-chalant attitude of behavioural-pattern among men and women.

Those of us who have undergone the phase of being scolded by parents,teachers or other elders,including at hands of their grandparents,be it for not being diligent at studies or in other spheres of life, fondly recall and thank those very scoldings which were horrible sounding and an anathema in those days of life.We are better off today for those very unsavoury scoldings we had once received.

On the other hand,one has witnessed unpleasant scenarios where desi parents have been imprisoned for having scolded their school-going children at home and charged with ‘offences’ of abuse and torture.

Is scolding the villain or game changer in contemporary society?

While it is tempting to sail with the winds of populist-thinking that scolding reflects a bad behaviour on part of the one scolding rather than the one being admonished,it is every one’s bounden duty to point out anything which seems to be an aberration from desirable set of actions or words : even at the cost of frank-talk thereby jeopardising inter-personal relationships.

For the betterment of all parties concerned- be it pupil,spouse,employee,servants,elected representatives of voting public or absolute strangers in public space,scoldings become a sine qua non,so to speak.

However,the repercussions could be either a fallout and estrangement or a closer,stronger bonding being fortified between them.

Scolding. Be polite. Violence need not be physical and abuses would never tantamount to being a mere scolding.

 

The line dividing chiding from assault on finer senses of a human being is not thin and can easily be measured by taking into account surrounding circumstances.

All in all,scolding can either mar and sour relations or bind them together in a more fastidious manner.

Scolding cannot be dubbed as a mannerless or insensitive behaviour nor can memes,cartoon-strips and sarcastic humour articles scribbled against unseemly behaviour of public figures pass off as harmless scolding.

A word of caution in the end : if you choose to communicate and convey your well-meaning thoughts to those you care for or are to one related as a ‘close person’, be all the more careful and cautious in so expressing because it could often times be easily misunderstood as castigating and your boat of love or care would get ship-wrecked causing collosal and unspeakable damage which can be irreparable.

Scolding as a form of communication is not irreplaceable since love underlines the intensity and gravity of any such act of ‘scolding’. A lesser mortal would succumb to ego and lose his or her benefactor. The wiser ones would evaluate and get further closer to the one caring. Fortitude and fortune go hand in hand.

 
Long live ‘scoldings’.